TIFU by knocking over a beer bottle.

This happened yesterday. To set the scene, I was a tad buttered up on this fine Saturday afternoon at my cousin's lakehouse, sipping on my (probably) sixth High Life and already giddy from recently whipping one of my compadres at bags. Everyone's just finished eating dinner, so my cousins were in the kitchen helping clean dishes.

My uncle calls me inside and asks me if I can help him maneuver this newfangled Bluetooth grill thermometer he just got so he could use it the next night. Being the cocky techy fuck I am, I waltz right inside and over to where he has his phone and this little gadget sprawled on the counter. My first knee-jerk reaction was to reach for the center button (aka the only button) on the little device, but for some reason I reach with both hands and knock over my 3/4-full room-temperature beer with the inside of my left elbow.

My initial reaction is to immediately grab the beer, place it upright and cover it with my hand so that it doesn't overflow. To add to that brilliant plan, apparently my hand decides to instinctively cover it with my thumb instead, because hey, I have sorta thick thumbs, maybe my thumb is thick enough to stem this bottle's explosive...explosion action. Wrong. Cue the lukewarm beer foam spraying all over the kitchen. Guess they don't call it the champagne of beers for nothing.

I drop the now foam-filled bottle onto the counter and look around. It was quiet for a good few seconds. It was actually pretty interesting to see how one half-bottle of warm beer can coat a kitchen in foam. The pantry door, the floor, the chairs, the counter, my uncle's shirt, all completely foamed. Thank God no phones or wall sockets got covered in foam, and the thermometer must've been waterproof because it was fine too. Without a word, I ran to the sink and grabbed a rag. After a half hour of apologizing and ferocious scrubbing, there was no more mess, but you could smell it. Hooooooly shit you could still smell it. The scene was clean, but with a stench entrenched.

 

TL;DR: I'm a little popped up, my uncle asks me how to work some electronic thing he bought, I come in but knock over my beer and proceed to shower the kitchen in foam.